I’ve been taking a Psychophysiology class in college which
is basically about the templates that you have engrained into your very being
and your reactions to them as you move throughout life. In other words, if you’ve
been told that you were not good looking or that you were a loser during your
younger years, then you grow up believing it. On the flip side, if you were
told that you were the best looking guy in your high school, you engrained that
into your psyche. Unfortunately, as you begin to age, you may not be the best
looking guy anymore. The individual that had been told how good looking he was over and
over again throughout their younger years now has this image of themselves as “the most attractive” and would have a hard time accepting that they’re no longer the best
looking guy in their group anymore. These types of stimuli and labels that we (and
others) attach to us when we are younger (ages 5 through young adulthood)
affect us when we become adults and will keep affecting us until we decide to
make a change. And that change has to be internal.
So, with all that being said, this now brings me to my main
topic of this post which is internal self-improvement.
First off, let me say that I am totally against someone
trying to change you from who you really are. If you like sports, then like
sports. If you have brown hair and you like your hair color, then have brown
hair. I am against someone trying to change or mold someone to what they want them to be.
Nothing irritates me more than a guy starting a romantic
relationship with a girl to say, “You know, I really like blondes better. You
should bleach you hair blonde.” Really? (I think this guy just won the douche
bag of the year award.) On the flip side, women do this to men too whether they
want them to look more like Brad Pitt or some other Hollywood heartthrob.
Either way, this is wrong.
The only thing that you should really be concerned with is changing
who you are on the inside. If you have addictions, let them go. If you
have a bad attitude most of the day, strive to change it. If you look at the
world with a “glass half empty” view, try changing your outlook to a more
positive one. The changes that we should be making are internal, not external.
If you’re not happy with your external appearance and want
to change it then that’s fine; but remember that the work has to be done from
an internal level first.